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Happy Valentines Day, Tucson. Now, Let’s Explore Couples’ Therapy

Feb 14, 20163 min read

Over a decade ago, my then-boyfriend and I arrived in Tucson. We had traveled in a 3,000-mile arc—from North Carolina to upstate New York to Ohio and then to Arizona. It was July and our car air conditioner was iffy. We had two cats in the backseat. Kansas seemed a never ending blur. At four in the morning, we were welcomed by the glow of the Waffle House sign on 22nd Street and I-10. We drank watery coffee and inhaled plates of hashed browns. Outside the window, a giant prickly pear was lit up by the moon. We took turns napping on the yellow formica table until the sun began to rise.

We rented an apartment next to a raspado shop and ate raspados for days on end. Half the town had fled to less sweltering locations, and I remember thinking that the streets looked so empty and wide. That summer was filled with Tucson firsts of all kinds—my first tumbleweed, my first monsoon, the first car I saw submerged in a flooded 6th Avenue underpass, my first Grill tater tot drenched in creamy pesto sauce.

In the last ten years, I’ve seen enormous changes in Tucson–and I know that people who have been here for twenty and thirty years have witnessed even more. Downtown is now home to loft-style apartments, a streetcar, and approximately three bazillion new restaurants. We can buy $13 drinks from mixologists wearing suspenders in underground bars. We can now consume fancy ramen noodles. Pinball is back. And that’s interesting and all, but here’s why I really love you, Tucson.

I love our farmers continuing a 4,000 year tradition of growing food in the desert. I love our ranchers raising ethical meat. I love our chefs and food workers working their asses off in the kitchen. I love all of the people who go to work before the sun comes up and after the sun goes down. I love our desert harvesters and medicine makers and conservationists and beekeepers. I love whoever is watching out for El Jefe the jaguar. I love our innovators installing hydroponics systems in alleyways. I love our teachers connecting kids with real food. I love our artists and writers giving voice. I love our community organizers installing neighborhood gardens and teaching small business classes and getting local produce into hospital cafeterias.

Tucson, I love you.

But you know what? I think we can be better.

I mean, isn’t that what love is? Shouldn’t we be invested in one another enough to challenge and encourage growth, even when it feels hard? Shouldn’t we be checking in with each other, saying, How are you doing? Do you have what you need to thrive?

If we’re so into each other, shouldn’t we want to do the uncomfortable work of recognizing where and how our food culture is still holding people back? Shouldn’t we abandon our terrible environmental habits so that we can cohabitate until we’re really fucking old?

On that note, I love you so much—you know what I want to see?

I want the local food hype to trickle down to the human beings who grow that food—in the form of actual money, so they can pay their mortgages and go to the dentist. I want food workers to get paid a living wage. I want farmers’ markets to stop allowing people to resell cheap produce that undercuts our farmers. I want childcare available at community meetings. I want everybody to be able to celebrate our City of Gastronomy designation. I want someone to give a bunch of money to Flowers & Bullets. And Casa Libre. And Iskashitaa Refugee Network. And all of the other groups working to create space for people to feel safe, heard, and empowered.

So, as one of your committed and loving partners, I say this: Tucson, I love you. And we still have work to do together. I’m so excited for our future. Happy Valentine’s Day.

Onward.

Article written by:

Debbie Weingarten

Debbie Weingarten

More about Debbie
Debbie Weingarten is a freelance writer based in Tucson, Arizona. She is a former vegetable farmer, co-founder of the Farm Education Resource Network, and serves on the Leadership Council for the Pima County Food Alliance. She also really likes horchata.

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@Sonoranrestaurantweek is almost here! September 4–13!🌵

This year, Flying V at @loewsventana is featuring a special K4 Ranch Prime Beef Tasting for $55.🥩

Dry-Aged Beef Tartare
Koji-Honey Vinaigrette, Fermented Tomato, Shallot, Pistachio, Fry Bread I *+18 add Flying V Special Reserve Caviar I *Casa Madero - Chardonnay — Valle de Parras, Mexico 

Tournedos of Filet Mignon
Desert Pearl Oyster Mushrooms, Del Bac Demi Glace, Our Beef Garum, Chives I Family Style: Hayden Mills Polenta, Farmer’s Market Featured Vegetables I *Merkin — Chupacabra Red - (Grenache, Mourvédre, Syrah, Petite Sirah) - Willcox, Arizona 

Caramel Butter Cake
Exo Coffee-Toffee Sauce, Bread Syrup, Preserved Jujube Chutney, Bone Marrow Ice Cream I *Flying Leap — Sangiovese – Elgin, Arizona 

See menus and build your itinerary on Tucsonfoodie/srw👈
#tucsonfoodie #tucsonevents@Sonoranrestaurantweek is almost here! September 4–13!🌵 This year, Flying V at @loewsventana is featuring a special K4 Ranch Prime Beef Tasting for $55.🥩 Dry-Aged Beef Tartare Koji-Honey Vinaigrette, Fermented Tomato, Shallot, Pistachio, Fry Bread I *+18 add Flying V Special Reserve Caviar I *Casa Madero - Chardonnay — Valle de Parras, Mexico Tournedos of Filet Mignon Desert Pearl Oyster Mushrooms, Del Bac Demi Glace, Our Beef Garum, Chives I Family Style: Hayden Mills Polenta, Farmer’s Market Featured Vegetables I *Merkin — Chupacabra Red - (Grenache, Mourvédre, Syrah, Petite Sirah) - Willcox, Arizona Caramel Butter Cake Exo Coffee-Toffee Sauce, Bread Syrup, Preserved Jujube Chutney, Bone Marrow Ice Cream I *Flying Leap — Sangiovese – Elgin, Arizona See menus and build your itinerary on Tucsonfoodie/srw👈 #tucsonfoodie #tucsonevents
TOMORROW! An evening of food, plants, and connection returns under the desert sky.🌵✨

In partnership with @salus.healers, join us tomorrow, August 29, at @tohonochul for Desert Magic, a one-night celebration of the edible and medicinal beauty of the Sonoran Desert. Stroll the gardens, drink in hand, and discover chef and wellness stations along the way. 

🌿WELLNESS PRACTITIONERS offering sound healing, massage, somatic therapy, readings, reiki, plant walks, workshops & more: @awakenedwombs | @curavidabodywork | @dharmawellness.center | @drkorigiudici | Ease Bodywork | @itsme.emmav | @healingspiritsoaks | @marie.heartnectar | @innerblissenergetics | @jessi.kyte.bodywork | Medicine Within | @monsoonmystics | @morosomedicalcenter | @intuitive_readings_by_zev | @sugarmelovetucson | @tantricheart_coaching | @gathering_point_ | @thehealinghubaz | The Somatic Sound 

🔥FOOD: @el_chef_padilla (@copperashculinary) | @landofmilknhoney (@tohonochulgardenbistro) | @chefdevonsanner (@sandpcreative) | Chef Gracie Soto (@anita_st_market) | @chefjosetucson (@ameliastucson) | @kenneth.foy | Obie Hindman & @tuckerhartford (@tucsoncityofgastronomy & @solpuebloprovisions) | @archimagirus_cultro (@scratchingtheplate)

🥣 SOUNDS @tucsonmodernjazzquartet | DJ Sets by Rosa Dragona & LaDev

Ticket includes wellness stations, herb walks, workshops, sound healing, & botanical drinks.

Tap the link in bio to grab yours! 🎟️✨ 

Video by @dalton.voss 
#tucsonfoodie #tucsoneventTOMORROW! An evening of food, plants, and connection returns under the desert sky.🌵✨ In partnership with @salus.healers, join us tomorrow, August 29, at @tohonochul for Desert Magic, a one-night celebration of the edible and medicinal beauty of the Sonoran Desert. Stroll the gardens, drink in hand, and discover chef and wellness stations along the way. 🌿WELLNESS PRACTITIONERS offering sound healing, massage, somatic therapy, readings, reiki, plant walks, workshops & more: @awakenedwombs | @curavidabodywork | @dharmawellness.center | @drkorigiudici | Ease Bodywork | @itsme.emmav | @healingspiritsoaks | @marie.heartnectar | @innerblissenergetics | @jessi.kyte.bodywork | Medicine Within | @monsoonmystics | @morosomedicalcenter | @intuitive_readings_by_zev | @sugarmelovetucson | @tantricheart_coaching | @gathering_point_ | @thehealinghubaz | The Somatic Sound 🔥FOOD: @el_chef_padilla (@copperashculinary) | @landofmilknhoney (@tohonochulgardenbistro) | @chefdevonsanner (@sandpcreative) | Chef Gracie Soto (@anita_st_market) | @chefjosetucson (@ameliastucson) | @kenneth.foy | Obie Hindman & @tuckerhartford (@tucsoncityofgastronomy & @solpuebloprovisions) | @archimagirus_cultro (@scratchingtheplate) 🥣 SOUNDS @tucsonmodernjazzquartet | DJ Sets by Rosa Dragona & LaDev Ticket includes wellness stations, herb walks, workshops, sound healing, & botanical drinks. Tap the link in bio to grab yours! 🎟️✨ Video by @dalton.voss #tucsonfoodie #tucsonevent
SPECIAL DINNERS DURING SONORAN RESTAURANT WEEK🌵

@Sonoranrestaurantweek is ONE WEEK AWAY! In addition to prix-fixe menus around Tucson, @sonoranrestaurantweek features a lineup of special dinners and one very special brunch. Here’s the schedule:

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 4 • 6 PM
Inca’s Peruvian Cuisine Special Dinner
📍 @incasperuviancuisine 
 
SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 5 • 6 PM
Penca Special Dinner
📍 @pencarestaurante 

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 • 11 AM–2 PM
Sonoran Restaurant Week Brunch Takeover
📍 Flying V @loewsventana 

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 • 6:30 PM
Whole Hog BBQ Dinner
📍 @bashfulbanditbbq 

TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 8 • 6 PM
Sunshine Wine Special Dinner
📍 @sunshine_wine_tucson with @queenofcupswines 

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 9 • 6 PM
BOCA by Chef Maria Mazon Special Dinner
📍 @bocatucson 

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10 • 6 PM
Bacio Italiano Special Dinner with @vertigo.wines 
📍 @bacio.italianoaz 

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 11 • 6 PM
Cielos Special Dinner
📍 @cielostucson 

SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12 • 6 PM 
Nana’s Kitchen Special Dinner with @rombauervineyards 
📍 @nanas_kitchen_2008 

SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 • 6 PM
Wild Garlic Grill Special Dinner
📍 @wildgarlicgrillofficial 

Several events have limited seating and require tickets or reservations, so plan ahead!

Sonoran Restaurant Week runs September 4–13. Tap the link in our bio for menus, tickets, reservations, and more.❤️

#SRW2026 #sonoranrestaurantweek
#tucsonfoodie #tucsonfoodieeventsSPECIAL DINNERS DURING SONORAN RESTAURANT WEEK🌵 @Sonoranrestaurantweek is ONE WEEK AWAY! In addition to prix-fixe menus around Tucson, @sonoranrestaurantweek features a lineup of special dinners and one very special brunch. Here’s the schedule: FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 4 • 6 PM Inca’s Peruvian Cuisine Special Dinner 📍 @incasperuviancuisine SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 5 • 6 PM Penca Special Dinner 📍 @pencarestaurante SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 • 11 AM–2 PM Sonoran Restaurant Week Brunch Takeover 📍 Flying V @loewsventana SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 6 • 6:30 PM Whole Hog BBQ Dinner 📍 @bashfulbanditbbq TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 8 • 6 PM Sunshine Wine Special Dinner 📍 @sunshine_wine_tucson with @queenofcupswines WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 9 • 6 PM BOCA by Chef Maria Mazon Special Dinner 📍 @bocatucson THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 10 • 6 PM Bacio Italiano Special Dinner with @vertigo.wines 📍 @bacio.italianoaz FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 11 • 6 PM Cielos Special Dinner 📍 @cielostucson SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 12 • 6 PM Nana’s Kitchen Special Dinner with @rombauervineyards 📍 @nanas_kitchen_2008 SUNDAY, SEPTEMBER 13 • 6 PM Wild Garlic Grill Special Dinner 📍 @wildgarlicgrillofficial Several events have limited seating and require tickets or reservations, so plan ahead! Sonoran Restaurant Week runs September 4–13. Tap the link in our bio for menus, tickets, reservations, and more.❤️ #SRW2026 #sonoranrestaurantweek #tucsonfoodie #tucsonfoodieevents
Win 2 tickets to Oktober Foodie Fest! 🍺🥨🌭

Oktober Foodie Fest returns to @corbettstucson on Saturday, September 26th. It’s Oktoberfest, but with a Tucson Foodie flavor all its own!

🎶 Live Music 🍺 Craft Beer Garden 🏋️ Classic Contests 🥨 Authentic German Eats ✚ MORE! 

Here’s how to enter:
1️⃣ Follow @tucsonfoodie & @corbettstucson
2️⃣ Tag 1 friend (Your best brat-buddy🌭) and comment “Let’s go to OktoberFoodieFest!”
3️⃣ We’ll draw our winner for the two passes Friday 8/28 at 9:45AM, just before tickets go on sale at 10:00 AM!

Tickets on sale Friday 8/28 @ 10AM PT
Tickets & more info ➡️ oktoberfoodiefest.eventbrite.com

⚠️ Note for Foodie Insider Members: Check your email for your 50% event discount code!Win 2 tickets to Oktober Foodie Fest! 🍺🥨🌭 Oktober Foodie Fest returns to @corbettstucson on Saturday, September 26th. It’s Oktoberfest, but with a Tucson Foodie flavor all its own! 🎶 Live Music 🍺 Craft Beer Garden 🏋️ Classic Contests 🥨 Authentic German Eats ✚ MORE! Here’s how to enter: 1️⃣ Follow @tucsonfoodie & @corbettstucson 2️⃣ Tag 1 friend (Your best brat-buddy🌭) and comment “Let’s go to OktoberFoodieFest!” 3️⃣ We’ll draw our winner for the two passes Friday 8/28 at 9:45AM, just before tickets go on sale at 10:00 AM! Tickets on sale Friday 8/28 @ 10AM PT Tickets & more info ➡️ oktoberfoodiefest.eventbrite.com ⚠️ Note for Foodie Insider Members: Check your email for your 50% event discount code!